Went to Matt Leaheys wedding last night. James hacked and coughed during the night and hopped into our bed and so we had a fitful sleep.
Couple of cool things happened today. I took James to John Walker park and we had a lot of fun there. He went on the little swing for ages, but also I went on the big swing and he sat on me and we had lots of giggles mucking around on that.
And the big thing...tonight he was looking through a toddler book and there were shapes of triangles and squares and diamonds and so-on, well he started pointing at them one (finger pressing on to the shape kind of poiting) after the other! And while he did this I named them, this went on for quite a wee while, I was so excited I called Michelle through.
Michelle has been getting him to use the iPod and some games where he has to press his finger on it, she has been guiding him with the finger pointing, so maybe thats it?
Pointing...brillant...I hope he keeps that up!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Thu 25/2/2010
Took James to LS this morning. Normally he does Monday and Wednesday, but we arranged for him to go today as a casual as he is being assessed by the child development team.
We got there at 8:35 and I saw one of them there already in the office interviewing the head teacher.
I did some playing with James with some farm animals and fences. He just wanted to play with the fences mainly. He did get some animals and smashed their faces together.
Took him into the mat room where there were balloons and fly swatters. I tried playing with him and got him to hit the balloons a bit. While bouncing a balloon at him I hit a little blonde poppet on the head 'hey you got me!' she said so I made a game with her out of it and another littlie joined in and they were having fun hitting the balloons towards me, while this was happening James was looking vacant and spinning around a bit.
James got a balloon and tried squashing it.
I then gave James cuddles and kisses and we left and waved to him through the window. By then two CDT people were there and they were observing this.
-------------------------------------------------------------
So we just went to Pukitiro for a few hours. here's what I posted on another site:
"My wife and I just went and spent a few hrs with the Paediatricians who have been assessing my son, and they gave us the diagnosis of 'classic' Autism for James. Which was what I guess I expected and somewhat of a relief to be honest.
It provides us with some affirmation and means others have something to consider. It's hard when people say things like 'There's nothing wrong with him' - when he can't talk or interact normally with people.
Afterwards we went to the local Cafe and read through the material the Paediatricians had given us. I was fine and feeling OK with this until I came to a page with a picture of a teenager lying back in a Hammock. He is about 18, and is wearing a red polo shirt like James wears to little school. He has short dark hair. His Mum is reaching out and stroking his head and he is looking at her smiling and touching her arm. But what gets me is the way he is obviously Autistic, just the angle of his head tilted back and to one side, and the way he is smiling. And the fact he is handsome, just like my little boy.
James has everything else in his favour, he is good looking, healthy, tall, well built...but for his autism what might have been... :-(
We got there at 8:35 and I saw one of them there already in the office interviewing the head teacher.
I did some playing with James with some farm animals and fences. He just wanted to play with the fences mainly. He did get some animals and smashed their faces together.
Took him into the mat room where there were balloons and fly swatters. I tried playing with him and got him to hit the balloons a bit. While bouncing a balloon at him I hit a little blonde poppet on the head 'hey you got me!' she said so I made a game with her out of it and another littlie joined in and they were having fun hitting the balloons towards me, while this was happening James was looking vacant and spinning around a bit.
James got a balloon and tried squashing it.
I then gave James cuddles and kisses and we left and waved to him through the window. By then two CDT people were there and they were observing this.
-------------------------------------------------------------
So we just went to Pukitiro for a few hours. here's what I posted on another site:
"My wife and I just went and spent a few hrs with the Paediatricians who have been assessing my son, and they gave us the diagnosis of 'classic' Autism for James. Which was what I guess I expected and somewhat of a relief to be honest.
It provides us with some affirmation and means others have something to consider. It's hard when people say things like 'There's nothing wrong with him' - when he can't talk or interact normally with people.
Afterwards we went to the local Cafe and read through the material the Paediatricians had given us. I was fine and feeling OK with this until I came to a page with a picture of a teenager lying back in a Hammock. He is about 18, and is wearing a red polo shirt like James wears to little school. He has short dark hair. His Mum is reaching out and stroking his head and he is looking at her smiling and touching her arm. But what gets me is the way he is obviously Autistic, just the angle of his head tilted back and to one side, and the way he is smiling. And the fact he is handsome, just like my little boy.
James has everything else in his favour, he is good looking, healthy, tall, well built...but for his autism what might have been... :-(
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Sun 21/2/2010
Took the kids swimming today at Porirua, James loved it he is getting more compliant now, instead of fighting to get out of the dressing room, and run into the pool naked, he knows the routine and is good. Got some hysterical giggles swirling around in the swirling pool, good fun. I could tell Hannah was missing some attention, but it's really hard to focus on her when you are intent on keeping someone little from harm.
Had a barny with Hannah later over homework and later over tea culminating in me taking her to her bedroom kicking and screaming for the first time in ages. She is really pushing the boundaries at the moment and was quite tired today, also she did Super Sunday swimming this avo, so anyway she got off to sleep good and early so hope for better tomorrow. In fact might finish her fairy castle for her tonight.
James stayed up late in his room. I went in about 8:45 and found him he had torn 'Thomas comes to breakfast' into bits and was chewing on some of it!
Exciting thing today was had James on the tramp at one point and was chucking a ball on there and against my expectations he picked the ball up and threw it to me, so I got him to do that a few times and caught it for his amusement! Woot!
Had a barny with Hannah later over homework and later over tea culminating in me taking her to her bedroom kicking and screaming for the first time in ages. She is really pushing the boundaries at the moment and was quite tired today, also she did Super Sunday swimming this avo, so anyway she got off to sleep good and early so hope for better tomorrow. In fact might finish her fairy castle for her tonight.
James stayed up late in his room. I went in about 8:45 and found him he had torn 'Thomas comes to breakfast' into bits and was chewing on some of it!
Exciting thing today was had James on the tramp at one point and was chucking a ball on there and against my expectations he picked the ball up and threw it to me, so I got him to do that a few times and caught it for his amusement! Woot!
Friday, February 19, 2010
Thu 18/2/2010
Yesterday was the big day..the visit to the Child Development Team at Puketiro.
It is in that block of land that Keneperu is in, and the buildings and environment it smacks of the 60's or 70's and has a slightly dilapidated, somewhat abandoned feel.
So we got there at 9:30 and went in. There is a big reception area packed with big toys so James immediately started playing. The specialists came along, there was Andrew the Paediatrician, Vincent the child Psychologist and Kylie(?) the speech language therapist. They went into a room and I went to take James in, but he didn't want to go into the room he headed for the door out of reception back to the outside outside. His wobbly lasted all of about 4 seconds then he came along OK, as soon as we got in the room he saw all the toys and put a big grin on. The three specialists were in three chairs facing us where two chairs were placed. James then did a most curious thing, he went up to each of the three people and stood in front of each of them and did the biggest smile at each one. He even touched the Paediatricians leg. Talk about turn on the charm! He then went off to play. To cut a long story short, the specialists then proceeded to ask us questions for the next two hours about James and would often come back to points or drill into specific things. While they did this they wrote notes. For a fair bit of the time there would be two of them questioning us while either the speech language person (initially) or the Paediatrician would sit and play with James and interact with him, do tests and takes notes. The speech language person spent quite a bit of time playing with him and listening to his babble and talking with him.
I noticed the Paediatrician had a pre-printed sheet with boxes and things on it, some had ticks next to them, some had crosses. Some of the things he tried to get James to do was throw a ball into a box (which he did eventually after showing James what to do, get him to hand objects to the specialist from assorted objects mixed together (spoons, toy animals, etc) which he didn't do. got him to walk up some steps, tried to get him to jump off them.
Other things I remember, the Psychologist was particularly interested in the regression that James had where his language skills went backwards when we went over to Melbourne. They covered pretty much every question I think they could ask about. His behaviours, interactions, habits, things he liked to do, things he didn't, his eating habits, sleeping. The paediatrician checked his heart, ears, eyes, throat, weight, height, head size, testicles, reflexes (knee test).
At the end they had a conference for 5 minutes and got us to wait.
They then brought us in and said first off that he was 'a lovely boy'!, they then said they wanted to see him at little school so we arranged that. That is next Thursday and we have an appointment with them at 11:30 after they have been there where they will give us his diagnosis.
By the time we got out of there it was about 11:40am. We felt like they had been very thorough, and in fact I was tired from so much talking!
It is in that block of land that Keneperu is in, and the buildings and environment it smacks of the 60's or 70's and has a slightly dilapidated, somewhat abandoned feel.
So we got there at 9:30 and went in. There is a big reception area packed with big toys so James immediately started playing. The specialists came along, there was Andrew the Paediatrician, Vincent the child Psychologist and Kylie(?) the speech language therapist. They went into a room and I went to take James in, but he didn't want to go into the room he headed for the door out of reception back to the outside outside. His wobbly lasted all of about 4 seconds then he came along OK, as soon as we got in the room he saw all the toys and put a big grin on. The three specialists were in three chairs facing us where two chairs were placed. James then did a most curious thing, he went up to each of the three people and stood in front of each of them and did the biggest smile at each one. He even touched the Paediatricians leg. Talk about turn on the charm! He then went off to play. To cut a long story short, the specialists then proceeded to ask us questions for the next two hours about James and would often come back to points or drill into specific things. While they did this they wrote notes. For a fair bit of the time there would be two of them questioning us while either the speech language person (initially) or the Paediatrician would sit and play with James and interact with him, do tests and takes notes. The speech language person spent quite a bit of time playing with him and listening to his babble and talking with him.
I noticed the Paediatrician had a pre-printed sheet with boxes and things on it, some had ticks next to them, some had crosses. Some of the things he tried to get James to do was throw a ball into a box (which he did eventually after showing James what to do, get him to hand objects to the specialist from assorted objects mixed together (spoons, toy animals, etc) which he didn't do. got him to walk up some steps, tried to get him to jump off them.
Other things I remember, the Psychologist was particularly interested in the regression that James had where his language skills went backwards when we went over to Melbourne. They covered pretty much every question I think they could ask about. His behaviours, interactions, habits, things he liked to do, things he didn't, his eating habits, sleeping. The paediatrician checked his heart, ears, eyes, throat, weight, height, head size, testicles, reflexes (knee test).
At the end they had a conference for 5 minutes and got us to wait.
They then brought us in and said first off that he was 'a lovely boy'!, they then said they wanted to see him at little school so we arranged that. That is next Thursday and we have an appointment with them at 11:30 after they have been there where they will give us his diagnosis.
By the time we got out of there it was about 11:40am. We felt like they had been very thorough, and in fact I was tired from so much talking!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Tue 16/2/2010
A good day, got my work done that has been hanging over my head (RFP).
Anyways, picked James up from Vanessa's. As usual when I went in he ignored me for a minute. Then when it was time to acknowledge me, he took my hand and led me to Vanessa's stereo, so I turned it on and held his hands and he did a fair impression of dancing!
Otherwise not much else to report today. All good.
--------------------------------------------------
Just read about the possible relationship of Oxytocin to Autism. I also know it is released by touch but has to be skin to skin, so maybe I could cuddle James with our tops off! He certainly likes being massaged with the cream enough, and tonight when I was washing his body with the green pinetarsol stuff in the bath he certainly likes that too..hmm...
http://www.raysahelian.com/oxytocin.html
Anyways, picked James up from Vanessa's. As usual when I went in he ignored me for a minute. Then when it was time to acknowledge me, he took my hand and led me to Vanessa's stereo, so I turned it on and held his hands and he did a fair impression of dancing!
Otherwise not much else to report today. All good.
--------------------------------------------------
Just read about the possible relationship of Oxytocin to Autism. I also know it is released by touch but has to be skin to skin, so maybe I could cuddle James with our tops off! He certainly likes being massaged with the cream enough, and tonight when I was washing his body with the green pinetarsol stuff in the bath he certainly likes that too..hmm...
http://www.raysahelian.com/oxytocin.html
Monday 15/2/2010
Last night I came across Michelle in James room with him cradled in her arms. quietly sitting there with tears streaming down. My poor girl, wondering when James would ever cuddle her, or say hello mummy, or I love you.
I reminded her if he didn't love us and want to be near us he wouldn't hop into bed with us in the mornings. Or cry when we leave him at LS.
And that he can be cuddly in his way when the mood takes him (night times are often boisterous mood before bed!), and also that from my reading Autistic people have said they often wanted to be touched or held as children but it hurt.
But I know how she feels.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I held up the peanut butter and Vegemite this morning in front of James to try and get him to make a selection along with verbal prompting. He just looked at them a bit scratching and grinning. I just waited and after a minute he said 'peanut budder' - he didn't point or say no to anything but it was good enough for me, so I said 'good boy James' a few times and made him his toast.
At little school he sat down in the mat room (his favourite, always goes in there). The others kids were playing with baloons and fly swatters to hit them, James just sat down in front of the CD player and looked at the display and listened to the music smiling. When some songs came on he liked he jiggled up and down a bit and wobbled his head. When one came on that he didn't like - a slow nursery rhyme - he screwed up his face and said 'No, no no' and sat there frowning.
I cuddled him and kissed and told him we were going, we put him on Nia's knee and he frowned a bit and wriggled a lot but not too badly, and Hannah and I both waved and said goodbye and blew kisses. We got lots of eye contact and a few little smiles.
Then we waved through the window and got solid looks instead of looking away and quite a lot of smiles at our goofy antics, and Nia made both his arms wave, he seemed pretty happy!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
After work Hannah went off to Athletics with Michelle, me and James stayed behind. He was keen to go out to the street and took my hand, then to Michelle's car which he obviously wanted to get into. I let him and climbed in and hopped in his seat. So I thought why not, and got in and asked him where he wanted to go. I asked if he wanted to go to the park. No response was forthcoming of course so I drove to our local park. At the park I kept asking 'James want to go to the park?', 'James want to go on the slide?' - blank looks so took him there by the hand and had a very nice time on the swings. Not much connection with me, even though I was being silly, I got him giggling a little. He likes to close his eyes, and lean back and swing back and forth. We got off and did the running up and down thing too, where I hold his hand and we run from here to there.
Back home after a good 45 minutes and I cooked tea. While I was doing this I sang songs and got such a good response, started drumming and whistling and carrying on, he loves it, and laughs and smiles, and I love the attention! I will do more.
Later I put him to bed and tried reading a book, Peepo I even sang the rhyming verses but he was in teeth gritted jumping mode, so left him to it.
Tonight I made a big triangle out of the Duplo. Last night I made a big robot, and he was quite intrigued by it this morning and didn't just smash it up.
Had a call from Auntie Francie tonight, and a talk about other people not seeming to take us seriously. She does and even raised it with us, and she knows of course..better than anyone. She told us Michelle's dad said to her 'Seems OK to me, was talking away'. Where to begin..try talking to him..or..say his name and see what happens. Has he ever talked to you?
Etc!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Michelle told me about a woman at her work and her Aspergers 21yr old son who has no job and lives at home and plays Playstation all day. He has decided he wants a girlfriend and thinks its done through pick-up lines. His Mum cannot explain to him that that is not how it is done. But anyway every day she comes home he says 'hey Mum what about this one?'. Poor guy, he would never be able to understand the complex and subtle body language and rules about flirting with people. Sad, and of course a worry for me, that worries enough as it is.
I reminded her if he didn't love us and want to be near us he wouldn't hop into bed with us in the mornings. Or cry when we leave him at LS.
And that he can be cuddly in his way when the mood takes him (night times are often boisterous mood before bed!), and also that from my reading Autistic people have said they often wanted to be touched or held as children but it hurt.
But I know how she feels.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I held up the peanut butter and Vegemite this morning in front of James to try and get him to make a selection along with verbal prompting. He just looked at them a bit scratching and grinning. I just waited and after a minute he said 'peanut budder' - he didn't point or say no to anything but it was good enough for me, so I said 'good boy James' a few times and made him his toast.
At little school he sat down in the mat room (his favourite, always goes in there). The others kids were playing with baloons and fly swatters to hit them, James just sat down in front of the CD player and looked at the display and listened to the music smiling. When some songs came on he liked he jiggled up and down a bit and wobbled his head. When one came on that he didn't like - a slow nursery rhyme - he screwed up his face and said 'No, no no' and sat there frowning.
I cuddled him and kissed and told him we were going, we put him on Nia's knee and he frowned a bit and wriggled a lot but not too badly, and Hannah and I both waved and said goodbye and blew kisses. We got lots of eye contact and a few little smiles.
Then we waved through the window and got solid looks instead of looking away and quite a lot of smiles at our goofy antics, and Nia made both his arms wave, he seemed pretty happy!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
After work Hannah went off to Athletics with Michelle, me and James stayed behind. He was keen to go out to the street and took my hand, then to Michelle's car which he obviously wanted to get into. I let him and climbed in and hopped in his seat. So I thought why not, and got in and asked him where he wanted to go. I asked if he wanted to go to the park. No response was forthcoming of course so I drove to our local park. At the park I kept asking 'James want to go to the park?', 'James want to go on the slide?' - blank looks so took him there by the hand and had a very nice time on the swings. Not much connection with me, even though I was being silly, I got him giggling a little. He likes to close his eyes, and lean back and swing back and forth. We got off and did the running up and down thing too, where I hold his hand and we run from here to there.
Back home after a good 45 minutes and I cooked tea. While I was doing this I sang songs and got such a good response, started drumming and whistling and carrying on, he loves it, and laughs and smiles, and I love the attention! I will do more.
Later I put him to bed and tried reading a book, Peepo I even sang the rhyming verses but he was in teeth gritted jumping mode, so left him to it.
Tonight I made a big triangle out of the Duplo. Last night I made a big robot, and he was quite intrigued by it this morning and didn't just smash it up.
Had a call from Auntie Francie tonight, and a talk about other people not seeming to take us seriously. She does and even raised it with us, and she knows of course..better than anyone. She told us Michelle's dad said to her 'Seems OK to me, was talking away'. Where to begin..try talking to him..or..say his name and see what happens. Has he ever talked to you?
Etc!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Michelle told me about a woman at her work and her Aspergers 21yr old son who has no job and lives at home and plays Playstation all day. He has decided he wants a girlfriend and thinks its done through pick-up lines. His Mum cannot explain to him that that is not how it is done. But anyway every day she comes home he says 'hey Mum what about this one?'. Poor guy, he would never be able to understand the complex and subtle body language and rules about flirting with people. Sad, and of course a worry for me, that worries enough as it is.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Monday 15/2/2010
I held up the peanut butter and Vegemite this morning in front of James to try and get him to make a selection along with verbal prompting. He just looked at them a bit scratching and grinning. I just waited and after a minute he said 'peanut budder' - he didn't point or say no to anything but it was good enough for me, so I said 'good boy James' a few times and made him his toast.
At little school he sat down in the mat room (his favourite, always goes in there). The others kids were playing with baloons and fly swatters to hit them, James just sat down in front of the CD player and looked at the display and listened to the music smiling. When some songs came on he liked he jiggled up and down a bit and wobbled his head. When one came on that he didn't like - a slow nursery rhyme - he screwed up his face and said 'No, no no' and sat there frowning.
I cuddled him and kissed and told him we were going, we put him on Nia's knee and he frowned a bit and wriggled a lot but not too badly, and Hannah and I both waved and said goodbye and blew kisses. We got lots of eye contact and a few little smiles.
Then we waved through the window and got solid looks instead of looking away and quite a lot of smiles at our goofy antics, and Nia made both his arms wave, he seemed pretty happy!
----------------------------------------------------------
At little school he sat down in the mat room (his favourite, always goes in there). The others kids were playing with baloons and fly swatters to hit them, James just sat down in front of the CD player and looked at the display and listened to the music smiling. When some songs came on he liked he jiggled up and down a bit and wobbled his head. When one came on that he didn't like - a slow nursery rhyme - he screwed up his face and said 'No, no no' and sat there frowning.
I cuddled him and kissed and told him we were going, we put him on Nia's knee and he frowned a bit and wriggled a lot but not too badly, and Hannah and I both waved and said goodbye and blew kisses. We got lots of eye contact and a few little smiles.
Then we waved through the window and got solid looks instead of looking away and quite a lot of smiles at our goofy antics, and Nia made both his arms wave, he seemed pretty happy!
----------------------------------------------------------
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Sun 14/2/2010
Long day, seeing as Michelle had been out at a 60th and I at a Stag do (although we were home asleep by 1am).
Today James seemed a bit lethargic, generally.
A few observations:
He seems to get a bit bored at home. We went out to Mums for tea and when we left he seemed pretty happy to be going. I wonder if its that he gets bored, or that he likes being in the car. I think a bit of both, he does like the movement of the car, and also looking out the window.
At Mums he acted up a bit and Mum said, 'well he's got to learn' which annoyed both me and Michelle, which we found out later when talking. How is he supposed to learn these things? When he has no language? When he won't listen? Or look at us?
Through showing I guess, not through silly comments that's for sure.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Had the whole family up at the school earlier in the day, with the scooter, trike and tennis stuff. James hadn't seem too interested in the playground but when a group of six older boys ran up on there he ran up the ramp and stood next to them, then after a bit went down the slide. I think he wanted to be around the other children even though he doesn't know how to interact with them. I think this might be why he likes little school so much.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thinking about the picture cards, maybe I could make some up for when things are about to happen so he gets the idea what they are about. A car one, and a little school one and so-on.
Today James seemed a bit lethargic, generally.
A few observations:
He seems to get a bit bored at home. We went out to Mums for tea and when we left he seemed pretty happy to be going. I wonder if its that he gets bored, or that he likes being in the car. I think a bit of both, he does like the movement of the car, and also looking out the window.
At Mums he acted up a bit and Mum said, 'well he's got to learn' which annoyed both me and Michelle, which we found out later when talking. How is he supposed to learn these things? When he has no language? When he won't listen? Or look at us?
Through showing I guess, not through silly comments that's for sure.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Had the whole family up at the school earlier in the day, with the scooter, trike and tennis stuff. James hadn't seem too interested in the playground but when a group of six older boys ran up on there he ran up the ramp and stood next to them, then after a bit went down the slide. I think he wanted to be around the other children even though he doesn't know how to interact with them. I think this might be why he likes little school so much.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thinking about the picture cards, maybe I could make some up for when things are about to happen so he gets the idea what they are about. A car one, and a little school one and so-on.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Sat 13/02/2010
James was up till late last night, as in 9:30 cavorting around his room and singing and blabbing, and reading books and wrecking the place! No rhyme or reason to it, as he had had a busy day, no naps and no chocolate before bed.
Michelle said while at Jo's house he burst into song, something unrecognisable, but several verses, and every one finished with a loud YAY!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Today we have been tidying and are still tidying the house which was a shambles and doing load after load of washing, and playing with James at the same time, picking him up whenever possible and doing flips, and lying on the floor and wrestling and so-on.
Michelle went to the toy Library and has got a tea set and pretend cake with segments and candles. We have all been role playing at having a birthday by bringing the cake in and singing happy birthday, and blowing out the candles then pretending to cut and eat the cake, and having cups of tea, we have the teds out all joining in. James mimics us a bit, but it's not clear whether he understands.
I went out on the tramp for him for quite a while, I was out hanging out the washing and he came out to me obviously wanting my attention. I tried to enrol him in handing the washing to me, but he wasn't interested, he gently too my hand and led me to the tramp (I let him). On it I was singing 'this is the way we wash our hair, wash our hair' I made up lots of alternative sentences about things he does, e.g. going to little school, eating peanut butter on toast, visiting Marco etc and he really enjoyed that and was laughing and smiling.
Just been playing with the cars in the hall and trying to show him how to play, pushing them along the hall and going 'crash', he looks a bit mystified, and when he plays with the cars just likes to get down and push them back and forward and look at the wheels mainly. I have a lot more patience for this sort of thing now, knowing the importance of it, and that he's not going to develop unless we help.
----------------------------------------------------------------
He has been doing puzzles. I think he's over puzzles at the moment. Been getting him to do some drawing with felts and pencils, he is babbling a LOT while doing it. I have been drawing circles squares and triangles.
Michelle said while at Jo's house he burst into song, something unrecognisable, but several verses, and every one finished with a loud YAY!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Today we have been tidying and are still tidying the house which was a shambles and doing load after load of washing, and playing with James at the same time, picking him up whenever possible and doing flips, and lying on the floor and wrestling and so-on.
Michelle went to the toy Library and has got a tea set and pretend cake with segments and candles. We have all been role playing at having a birthday by bringing the cake in and singing happy birthday, and blowing out the candles then pretending to cut and eat the cake, and having cups of tea, we have the teds out all joining in. James mimics us a bit, but it's not clear whether he understands.
I went out on the tramp for him for quite a while, I was out hanging out the washing and he came out to me obviously wanting my attention. I tried to enrol him in handing the washing to me, but he wasn't interested, he gently too my hand and led me to the tramp (I let him). On it I was singing 'this is the way we wash our hair, wash our hair' I made up lots of alternative sentences about things he does, e.g. going to little school, eating peanut butter on toast, visiting Marco etc and he really enjoyed that and was laughing and smiling.
Just been playing with the cars in the hall and trying to show him how to play, pushing them along the hall and going 'crash', he looks a bit mystified, and when he plays with the cars just likes to get down and push them back and forward and look at the wheels mainly. I have a lot more patience for this sort of thing now, knowing the importance of it, and that he's not going to develop unless we help.
----------------------------------------------------------------
He has been doing puzzles. I think he's over puzzles at the moment. Been getting him to do some drawing with felts and pencils, he is babbling a LOT while doing it. I have been drawing circles squares and triangles.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Thu 11/2/2010
Ahh, my day 'off'!
After getting Hannah off to school, came back and put Thomas on for James who got very excited and started jumping up and down flapping his arms, giggling and making happy noises. I did the dishes, some laundry, packed some lunch and a few things and got enough of my shit together to get me and James out the house a little after 11am; destination Makara beach.
At Makara I got our coats and and we went for a walk along the bumpy seashore. I showed James seaweed (unimpressed). He of course stopped to run his hands through sand and I took a video. He tried once to walk into the water, but I stopped him as it was a cold day with a little drizzle and we had Jackets and shoes and longs on. There was a big Juvenile gull on the beach, and I was able to walk us right up to it, as in a meter away. James simply was not interested - or didn't appear that way - as you'd expect a kid to be.
We continued on and I took him for a walk around the rock pools at the point. There wasn't much life in them but I showed him some 'bead' seaweed. Also having been reading about odd sensory issues that kids have I got some kelp and ran it over his palms, 'slippery' he said and pulled his hands away repeatedly.
I took a few videos as we clambered around the rocks. A few times I made him walk over the rocks by just walking 10 meters away. A bit scary as he has to work really hard to do this and also he stands on the peaks of the elevated rocks sometimes but overall he is pretty good and shows good judgement.
We did the stone throwing game (we throw stones in the water and I say 'splash'!).
He seemed to be a bit disgruntled by this time, and on the way back he got me to carry him a bit. He kept spitting down his front and I realised it was when we were near the smelly seaweed. He played some more in the sand and I showed him how to dig a hole with a flat stick which he took and did lots of gouging grooves in the sand, but he wasn't that happy particularly with the small gritty sand stuck to his hands. As I carried him heading back to the car I could not get him to look at me. We approached some seagulls and I said 'seagulls' a few times, and he popped out the word. When we got back to the car his face lit up with a smile and he said 'car' with obvious relief. I washed his hands, then fed him in the car and he started to look at me a bit when I tried to get his attention.
We had been out walking about for 45 minutes, so it might have been hunger, tiredness, sandy hands and wet sandy feet, wanting to sit down and rest and be warm, being a bit overwhelmed by a new experience, or all of the above.
I guess the not looking thing is associated with some level of unhappiness. I notice this when I take him to child space, when I leave he tries not to look at us.
Headed up Karori way and through the backroads to J'ville Library. By the time we got there I was a bit zonked. On the way there he just sat silent in the back looking out the window and slowly eating. At the library I chose a few books for him while he played puzzles. Went to the Mall Cafe, then back to car and home.
At home I uploaded the video's to Picasa and showed him, he loved them and was giggling and grinning away. He also liked the recent photos of Hannah, and I pointed out everybody's names in the photos and vids; 'Thats James, that's Hannah' etc.
Mucked around at home a bit then up to school to get Hannah. Made the kids popcorn, played with James and his Duplo a bit and after some mucking around we went to the pool. He loves the pool. We have a bit of a routine, it starts with him getting into the pool wheelchair access ramp, then mad thrashing about in the big pool with me pulling him around and getting him to jump off the side, and him toeing me in the nads! Then we go to the learners pool for thrash around in there, then finally into the toddlers pool to be warm.
When we first go to the pool he is really engaged with me, but by the end by the time he is in the toddlers pool for a while he is really in another place. I can be in there just me and him and he will glide past me without even looking at me, or looks through me, even if I am talking to (at!) him.
After Hannahs lesson she came into the toddlers pool for a bit, then we went home for tea. After tea he got into his Duplo again and I played with him. He just likes to push the bricks together and pull them apart. I try to join in but he's lost in just pushing them together and pulling them apart in seemingly random way. So I started making towers, then a wall, and finally little houses (like jails!) that I started to put figures into. At that point he started to become interested in what I was doing. I made the figures run up and down his arms and added a pig and things like that and he was really taken with it and seemed to be copying me a bit with them. Put the kids in the Spa (he was grinning when he went in the water again) and to bed.
I think I will do more of that type of playing it's almost like he needs to be shown how and what to do in play. So I will keep it up. I haven't played with toys with him in the past as I've always had something 'to do' and I always thought kids just did playing automatically..but bugger it now, nothings more important than my son, other things can wait or be done later. Also it takes a little bit of practise to remember how to play like a child again, but once you get back into it - and it does take a mind shift to engage your imaginative mind again, it's creative and fun.
Thinking about him now, imaginative play has been almost absent from his repertoire. He does play with cars and his Thomas but it is mainly to watch the wheels go around and around. He does put the tracks together a bit.
I will make another house or something out of all the Duplo ready for the morning to surprise him!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Note. Every time we went to do something else today, e.g. heading back to the car from the beach, getting out of the pool, I carefully explained it to him. I do not know if he is listening or what he understands but certainly it seems to make a transition to something else easier. I guess even if he doesn't understand my words he knows from my careful talking to him that we are about to up and do something else?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Today when he was upset and wanted to go back to the car, I kept getting down face to face and asking him what the matter was, and he was looking at me and frowning. It made me think about the other day when he was trying to tell me something with the cloth, he was trying so desperately hard and could see it was so frustrating for him. It must be so hard for him sometimes, and I also think about times when he appears deaf where the communication problem is very obviously in the other direction.
After getting Hannah off to school, came back and put Thomas on for James who got very excited and started jumping up and down flapping his arms, giggling and making happy noises. I did the dishes, some laundry, packed some lunch and a few things and got enough of my shit together to get me and James out the house a little after 11am; destination Makara beach.
At Makara I got our coats and and we went for a walk along the bumpy seashore. I showed James seaweed (unimpressed). He of course stopped to run his hands through sand and I took a video. He tried once to walk into the water, but I stopped him as it was a cold day with a little drizzle and we had Jackets and shoes and longs on. There was a big Juvenile gull on the beach, and I was able to walk us right up to it, as in a meter away. James simply was not interested - or didn't appear that way - as you'd expect a kid to be.
We continued on and I took him for a walk around the rock pools at the point. There wasn't much life in them but I showed him some 'bead' seaweed. Also having been reading about odd sensory issues that kids have I got some kelp and ran it over his palms, 'slippery' he said and pulled his hands away repeatedly.
I took a few videos as we clambered around the rocks. A few times I made him walk over the rocks by just walking 10 meters away. A bit scary as he has to work really hard to do this and also he stands on the peaks of the elevated rocks sometimes but overall he is pretty good and shows good judgement.
We did the stone throwing game (we throw stones in the water and I say 'splash'!).
He seemed to be a bit disgruntled by this time, and on the way back he got me to carry him a bit. He kept spitting down his front and I realised it was when we were near the smelly seaweed. He played some more in the sand and I showed him how to dig a hole with a flat stick which he took and did lots of gouging grooves in the sand, but he wasn't that happy particularly with the small gritty sand stuck to his hands. As I carried him heading back to the car I could not get him to look at me. We approached some seagulls and I said 'seagulls' a few times, and he popped out the word. When we got back to the car his face lit up with a smile and he said 'car' with obvious relief. I washed his hands, then fed him in the car and he started to look at me a bit when I tried to get his attention.
We had been out walking about for 45 minutes, so it might have been hunger, tiredness, sandy hands and wet sandy feet, wanting to sit down and rest and be warm, being a bit overwhelmed by a new experience, or all of the above.
I guess the not looking thing is associated with some level of unhappiness. I notice this when I take him to child space, when I leave he tries not to look at us.
Headed up Karori way and through the backroads to J'ville Library. By the time we got there I was a bit zonked. On the way there he just sat silent in the back looking out the window and slowly eating. At the library I chose a few books for him while he played puzzles. Went to the Mall Cafe, then back to car and home.
At home I uploaded the video's to Picasa and showed him, he loved them and was giggling and grinning away. He also liked the recent photos of Hannah, and I pointed out everybody's names in the photos and vids; 'Thats James, that's Hannah' etc.
Mucked around at home a bit then up to school to get Hannah. Made the kids popcorn, played with James and his Duplo a bit and after some mucking around we went to the pool. He loves the pool. We have a bit of a routine, it starts with him getting into the pool wheelchair access ramp, then mad thrashing about in the big pool with me pulling him around and getting him to jump off the side, and him toeing me in the nads! Then we go to the learners pool for thrash around in there, then finally into the toddlers pool to be warm.
When we first go to the pool he is really engaged with me, but by the end by the time he is in the toddlers pool for a while he is really in another place. I can be in there just me and him and he will glide past me without even looking at me, or looks through me, even if I am talking to (at!) him.
After Hannahs lesson she came into the toddlers pool for a bit, then we went home for tea. After tea he got into his Duplo again and I played with him. He just likes to push the bricks together and pull them apart. I try to join in but he's lost in just pushing them together and pulling them apart in seemingly random way. So I started making towers, then a wall, and finally little houses (like jails!) that I started to put figures into. At that point he started to become interested in what I was doing. I made the figures run up and down his arms and added a pig and things like that and he was really taken with it and seemed to be copying me a bit with them. Put the kids in the Spa (he was grinning when he went in the water again) and to bed.
I think I will do more of that type of playing it's almost like he needs to be shown how and what to do in play. So I will keep it up. I haven't played with toys with him in the past as I've always had something 'to do' and I always thought kids just did playing automatically..but bugger it now, nothings more important than my son, other things can wait or be done later. Also it takes a little bit of practise to remember how to play like a child again, but once you get back into it - and it does take a mind shift to engage your imaginative mind again, it's creative and fun.
Thinking about him now, imaginative play has been almost absent from his repertoire. He does play with cars and his Thomas but it is mainly to watch the wheels go around and around. He does put the tracks together a bit.
I will make another house or something out of all the Duplo ready for the morning to surprise him!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Note. Every time we went to do something else today, e.g. heading back to the car from the beach, getting out of the pool, I carefully explained it to him. I do not know if he is listening or what he understands but certainly it seems to make a transition to something else easier. I guess even if he doesn't understand my words he knows from my careful talking to him that we are about to up and do something else?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Today when he was upset and wanted to go back to the car, I kept getting down face to face and asking him what the matter was, and he was looking at me and frowning. It made me think about the other day when he was trying to tell me something with the cloth, he was trying so desperately hard and could see it was so frustrating for him. It must be so hard for him sometimes, and I also think about times when he appears deaf where the communication problem is very obviously in the other direction.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Stimming, normal people do it when emotions are extreem
Found this here http://aspieperspective.blogspot.com/2009/04/stimming-autistic-and-nt.html while googling 'stimming', heres the except that I find fascinating:
Discounting children's use of rocking horses and adults in rocking chairs, there's one circumstance in which NTs frequently rock. When they're given extremely distressing news (e.g. the death of a loved one), many individuals will have a reaction that's quite familiar to many autistics. Specifically, they will start crying, almost hold themselves, and start to rock back and forth. Despite the extreme circumstances, this rocking serves almost the exact same function as it does in autistics: it's a soothing motion, one that helps the individual cope with an extreme emotion.
In NTs, head-hitting and head-banging is usually reserved for moments of extreme frustration or what I like to refer to as "D'oh!" moments. While NTs usually don't engage in this behavior with the same intensity (or frequency) that many autistics have been known to, that is a quantitative, not qualitative, difference.
Hand-flapping also follows this pattern. If you've ever watched videos of people as they are informed that they won the lottery (or Publisher's Clearinghouse sweepstakes, etc.), you probably know what I mean: many people in such circumstances jump up and down, waving their hands excitedly... in a manner quite familiar to most in the autism and autistic communities.
Finally, object-spinning is mostly a matter of autistic children (which is to say that autistic adults don't do it nearly as much). Parallels in NT children are pathetically easy to find. Simply put, neurotypical children like spinning toys. Autistic kids like to spin toys... including spinning toys.
So does that mean Autistic people just have stronger emotions, or express stimming at lower levels of those emotions?
Discounting children's use of rocking horses and adults in rocking chairs, there's one circumstance in which NTs frequently rock. When they're given extremely distressing news (e.g. the death of a loved one), many individuals will have a reaction that's quite familiar to many autistics. Specifically, they will start crying, almost hold themselves, and start to rock back and forth. Despite the extreme circumstances, this rocking serves almost the exact same function as it does in autistics: it's a soothing motion, one that helps the individual cope with an extreme emotion.
In NTs, head-hitting and head-banging is usually reserved for moments of extreme frustration or what I like to refer to as "D'oh!" moments. While NTs usually don't engage in this behavior with the same intensity (or frequency) that many autistics have been known to, that is a quantitative, not qualitative, difference.
Hand-flapping also follows this pattern. If you've ever watched videos of people as they are informed that they won the lottery (or Publisher's Clearinghouse sweepstakes, etc.), you probably know what I mean: many people in such circumstances jump up and down, waving their hands excitedly... in a manner quite familiar to most in the autism and autistic communities.
Finally, object-spinning is mostly a matter of autistic children (which is to say that autistic adults don't do it nearly as much). Parallels in NT children are pathetically easy to find. Simply put, neurotypical children like spinning toys. Autistic kids like to spin toys... including spinning toys.
So does that mean Autistic people just have stronger emotions, or express stimming at lower levels of those emotions?
Wednesday 10/2/2010
James woke up pretty happy this morning about 7:15, and was sitting in his bed smiling for a wee while. I went in to say hello as I always do and gave him a cuddle. He went into our room after a bit and I realised his nappy smaelt pretty bad so got Michelle to change him. He was reluctant but we explained that 'theres poos in there' and 'we need to change your nappy', and so he came into his bedroom. He initially wouldn't come and sit on the floor and Michelle kept coaxing him with language - instead of picking him up and putting him on the floor, and after about 30 seconds he came and lay down to be changed.
After that he got in our bed and was snuggling under the covers. I chucked the sheets and blankets over his head so he was covered - I got the idea from his wriggling that maybe he wanted to do this and was struggling to 'get under' the sheets, and he seemed to enjoy it.
I then told him it was time for breakfast and to come with me. He was a little reluctant at first mention, but by repeating myself about breakfast I got him to come along easily - and holding his hand.
I placed him on the stool and asked him if he wanted toast or weetbix. As usual no response. He was not really looking at me. I asked several times. I looked around for the pictures but we do not have one of weetbix, so just made him weetbix. While the weetbix was in the microwave he grizzled a little and was looking over towards it. Wehn I got the weetbix out and put it in front of him he just looked at it, so I started him off by putting some in his mouth and giving him the spoon and so he started feeding himself.
He ate about 2/3 and then started making noises about getting down. He will not get off the stool by himself. I also made toast with peanut butter. I got the peanut butter out and said 'peanut butter' and held it in front of hima lot but he was not really looking. I put the jar on my head and got a smile but nothing else. He didn't seem interested in the toast when I made it - just not hungry I guess.
I mentioned little school this morning a few times, this as usual gets a smile and some wriggling type 'happy' movements, which is cool. When he's very happy he does jumping.
When I came to get him dressed he was in our room, I was in his, I called him to come and get his 'little school tshirt on' and he came and did this. I put his short on standing up and said 'feet in the holes' as I always do and he put one foot, I asked again for him to put the second using 'other foot in the hole' but he didn't and seemed away with the fairys so I did this myself. When I do any dressing he likes to hang on to me and stops using his balance.
After that Hannah turned the TV on and he sat down to watch, I turned it off (not allowed) and he just sat there, after a while he played with the remote a little maybe to try and turn the TV on, who knows.
Through the morning we did quite a bit of the 'jumping game' on the bed and other places, he was quite keen and would come and seek me out. I would do this accompanied with counting or 'bounce, bounce, bounce'.
As usual when it came time to get in the car he came easily with prompting and no need to hold his hand - 'come on James lets go and hop in the car, we're going to little school', but he is very reluctant to walk down the stairs himself and groans, so I hold his hand. I do this by only letting him hold a finger and stay in front of hi, that way he can't rely on my balance and actually does it himself - otherwise he would hold on and use my balance and swing around, but I think it gives him reassurance. Perhaps walking up and down is something I can work on with him..
When I parked the car at LS I got out and was waving at him through the window and making faces but getting little reaction, he was away with the fairies so I opened the door and was putting my face next to him and being silly and nuzzling and kissing him, and got lots of smiles and wriggling. Got Hannah to take him in and when we got in he started grizzling so I took his hand as I went around the place and he was happy at that - it's almost like as he gets in and turns around once or twice he loses sight of me and worries that I am gone. We then went and played in the mat room with some little elephants of different sizes and shapes that you connect up, Hannah leading the way with making a big ring. I showed James how they click together and he started doing this. We stayed probably 10 minutes talking to Lisa and then I told him I was going and gave him quite a few kisses and some cuddles. He seemed OK, maybe a little tired (saw a yawn) or zoned out. We then got up and left waving to him and saying goodbye with him giving us some eye contact, he frowned a little but was otherwise fine. It was quite in there, there were no other kids, and I think the settling time and peace (also classical music was playing quietly) helps.
We waved through the window and he did look at us and did a little bit of wriggling and frowning but was otherwise good, so we left.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
THOUGHTS
I have been thinking about the sensory side after watching vidoes on the Taylor Morris site last night. For example her talking about how fleece actually hurts her hands and thumbs but she can wear it fine, and how some sounds cause physical pain. Also the 15yr old boy talking about going outside into the noisy bright world and it's like everything goes upside down, and starts spinning.
I now wonder if the wriggling is a reaction to certain materials on him? I wonder how things feel to him in general? And I wonder if he is hurting all the time with some things..or not. He does seem to be the type that when things are bothering him - in as much as we can tell - that he becomes withdrawn more. Sounds don't seem to bother him as far as we can tell, but it could be they do and we don't know.
In other thoughts, how am I feeling? To quote Marcellus Wallace from pulp fiction "I'm pretty fucking far from alright".
After that he got in our bed and was snuggling under the covers. I chucked the sheets and blankets over his head so he was covered - I got the idea from his wriggling that maybe he wanted to do this and was struggling to 'get under' the sheets, and he seemed to enjoy it.
I then told him it was time for breakfast and to come with me. He was a little reluctant at first mention, but by repeating myself about breakfast I got him to come along easily - and holding his hand.
I placed him on the stool and asked him if he wanted toast or weetbix. As usual no response. He was not really looking at me. I asked several times. I looked around for the pictures but we do not have one of weetbix, so just made him weetbix. While the weetbix was in the microwave he grizzled a little and was looking over towards it. Wehn I got the weetbix out and put it in front of him he just looked at it, so I started him off by putting some in his mouth and giving him the spoon and so he started feeding himself.
He ate about 2/3 and then started making noises about getting down. He will not get off the stool by himself. I also made toast with peanut butter. I got the peanut butter out and said 'peanut butter' and held it in front of hima lot but he was not really looking. I put the jar on my head and got a smile but nothing else. He didn't seem interested in the toast when I made it - just not hungry I guess.
I mentioned little school this morning a few times, this as usual gets a smile and some wriggling type 'happy' movements, which is cool. When he's very happy he does jumping.
When I came to get him dressed he was in our room, I was in his, I called him to come and get his 'little school tshirt on' and he came and did this. I put his short on standing up and said 'feet in the holes' as I always do and he put one foot, I asked again for him to put the second using 'other foot in the hole' but he didn't and seemed away with the fairys so I did this myself. When I do any dressing he likes to hang on to me and stops using his balance.
After that Hannah turned the TV on and he sat down to watch, I turned it off (not allowed) and he just sat there, after a while he played with the remote a little maybe to try and turn the TV on, who knows.
Through the morning we did quite a bit of the 'jumping game' on the bed and other places, he was quite keen and would come and seek me out. I would do this accompanied with counting or 'bounce, bounce, bounce'.
As usual when it came time to get in the car he came easily with prompting and no need to hold his hand - 'come on James lets go and hop in the car, we're going to little school', but he is very reluctant to walk down the stairs himself and groans, so I hold his hand. I do this by only letting him hold a finger and stay in front of hi, that way he can't rely on my balance and actually does it himself - otherwise he would hold on and use my balance and swing around, but I think it gives him reassurance. Perhaps walking up and down is something I can work on with him..
When I parked the car at LS I got out and was waving at him through the window and making faces but getting little reaction, he was away with the fairies so I opened the door and was putting my face next to him and being silly and nuzzling and kissing him, and got lots of smiles and wriggling. Got Hannah to take him in and when we got in he started grizzling so I took his hand as I went around the place and he was happy at that - it's almost like as he gets in and turns around once or twice he loses sight of me and worries that I am gone. We then went and played in the mat room with some little elephants of different sizes and shapes that you connect up, Hannah leading the way with making a big ring. I showed James how they click together and he started doing this. We stayed probably 10 minutes talking to Lisa and then I told him I was going and gave him quite a few kisses and some cuddles. He seemed OK, maybe a little tired (saw a yawn) or zoned out. We then got up and left waving to him and saying goodbye with him giving us some eye contact, he frowned a little but was otherwise fine. It was quite in there, there were no other kids, and I think the settling time and peace (also classical music was playing quietly) helps.
We waved through the window and he did look at us and did a little bit of wriggling and frowning but was otherwise good, so we left.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
THOUGHTS
I have been thinking about the sensory side after watching vidoes on the Taylor Morris site last night. For example her talking about how fleece actually hurts her hands and thumbs but she can wear it fine, and how some sounds cause physical pain. Also the 15yr old boy talking about going outside into the noisy bright world and it's like everything goes upside down, and starts spinning.
I now wonder if the wriggling is a reaction to certain materials on him? I wonder how things feel to him in general? And I wonder if he is hurting all the time with some things..or not. He does seem to be the type that when things are bothering him - in as much as we can tell - that he becomes withdrawn more. Sounds don't seem to bother him as far as we can tell, but it could be they do and we don't know.
In other thoughts, how am I feeling? To quote Marcellus Wallace from pulp fiction "I'm pretty fucking far from alright".
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Tue 9/2/2010
Last I night stayed up late on youtube looking at vids on autism..till 1:30PM. In the night James got into our bed.
----------------------------------------------------------
Michelle got James up this morning and I went and had a 'talk' with him while he was eating his peanut butter on toast she had made. He was pretty zoned out, but wasn't looking that interested in the toast and after a little while started grizzling so I got him down and put his toast on the low table. He grazed a little and then went walkabout.
----------------------------------------------------------
Picked James up from Vanessa's. He didn't even look at me for a minute or two, although I got down right next to him where he was sitting at a chair playing with felts not doing much. I took a felt and started drawing but he started pushing things around and hissing, he obviously wasn't happy at that. Made chit chat with Vanessa then left. I had walked so we started walking down the road, he was a little confused and wanted to walk back into Vanessa's, but I got down low and mentioned a few times that we were going home so he seemed OK to go along with me, but after a few meters seemed to want carrying so I did. As I walked down the street I talked to him about what was going past bikes (cyclists), motorbikes, cars and pointed. But he didn't look at them or pay any attention to me, he just looked around at the trees or the sky not really focusing. Its hard to know what is going on there. I talked to Michelle and she thinks it is if he is unprepared for something or it is unexpected he doesn't respond for quite a while. It's possible he was just tired and overwrought or over stimulated from having Holly and Luke
When we got home he spotted the spa and went up and was playing with the cover, obviously keen to get in so I put him in it. He was still quite remote. After a few minutes Mum came home with Hannah and Hannah got in too, Grandma came over to say hi to James and she got big smiles and lots of looks. James started to perk up and wanted to hold my hands.
Grandma left, then Michelle came home with tea. While eating tea James was looking at the sun through the cane blinds and constantly closing his eyes tight then opening them as he ate.
He perked up after tea and I played with him a little bit on the floor and got big cuddles where he lay still on his back on top of me (OK sort of cuddles!) and I cuddled him. We then played the usual 'stomping on dad' game and he squealed at ear splitting volume. A bit later I took him down the bedroom and played in the bed, hiding under the sheets and tickling him, he enjoyed that.
Then chucked both kids in the spa again (well they got in, James with my help), then off to bed. Hannah read James a book and he never got out of bed, I went to read him a book and realized he was just toast, and so shut the door, and never heard more, kaput to the world at 7:45PM. He was just dog tired and has been the last few days so he should get a good rest. Looking forward to seeing him in the morning and engaging with him, there's definitely days like today where he wakes up tired and it makes it hard probably for the whole day, other days where he wakes up smiling for all the world.
Found http://taylor-autism-aspergers-syndrome.com/ and got a real boost from that.
----------------------------------------------------------
Michelle got James up this morning and I went and had a 'talk' with him while he was eating his peanut butter on toast she had made. He was pretty zoned out, but wasn't looking that interested in the toast and after a little while started grizzling so I got him down and put his toast on the low table. He grazed a little and then went walkabout.
----------------------------------------------------------
Picked James up from Vanessa's. He didn't even look at me for a minute or two, although I got down right next to him where he was sitting at a chair playing with felts not doing much. I took a felt and started drawing but he started pushing things around and hissing, he obviously wasn't happy at that. Made chit chat with Vanessa then left. I had walked so we started walking down the road, he was a little confused and wanted to walk back into Vanessa's, but I got down low and mentioned a few times that we were going home so he seemed OK to go along with me, but after a few meters seemed to want carrying so I did. As I walked down the street I talked to him about what was going past bikes (cyclists), motorbikes, cars and pointed. But he didn't look at them or pay any attention to me, he just looked around at the trees or the sky not really focusing. Its hard to know what is going on there. I talked to Michelle and she thinks it is if he is unprepared for something or it is unexpected he doesn't respond for quite a while. It's possible he was just tired and overwrought or over stimulated from having Holly and Luke
When we got home he spotted the spa and went up and was playing with the cover, obviously keen to get in so I put him in it. He was still quite remote. After a few minutes Mum came home with Hannah and Hannah got in too, Grandma came over to say hi to James and she got big smiles and lots of looks. James started to perk up and wanted to hold my hands.
Grandma left, then Michelle came home with tea. While eating tea James was looking at the sun through the cane blinds and constantly closing his eyes tight then opening them as he ate.
He perked up after tea and I played with him a little bit on the floor and got big cuddles where he lay still on his back on top of me (OK sort of cuddles!) and I cuddled him. We then played the usual 'stomping on dad' game and he squealed at ear splitting volume. A bit later I took him down the bedroom and played in the bed, hiding under the sheets and tickling him, he enjoyed that.
Then chucked both kids in the spa again (well they got in, James with my help), then off to bed. Hannah read James a book and he never got out of bed, I went to read him a book and realized he was just toast, and so shut the door, and never heard more, kaput to the world at 7:45PM. He was just dog tired and has been the last few days so he should get a good rest. Looking forward to seeing him in the morning and engaging with him, there's definitely days like today where he wakes up tired and it makes it hard probably for the whole day, other days where he wakes up smiling for all the world.
Found http://taylor-autism-aspergers-syndrome.com/ and got a real boost from that.
Monday, February 8, 2010
8/2/2010
Felt quite blue at work today, thinking about James and what might and might not be. Didn't do a very good job of being a good employee although managed a good burst in the afternoon.
After I got home from work I changed into my SI (Standard Issue shorts and tshirt) and played with him on the floor. We played with Duplo bricks but I think he was frustrated as he was breaking the bricks up and sort of smashing them together. We played a bit with him standing on my chest and me holding his hands to support him as we do, with him jumping up and down and gritting his teeth and making sort of grunting and hissing noises. He likes to almost headbutt me, and sometime does. I wonder if it's him letting a bit of pent up energy, frustration etc out. He also squealed at ear shattering volume a few times, my ears are ringing a bit now!
I took him out on the tramp and we bounced around and played a bit. I would love to hear him say 'posie' or 'meenie' again (Ring a ring a Rosie song or Eenie Meenie song) like he used to. A few planes went over and I pointed up at them and said plane. The first few times he looked at them, whether from the noise or me saying plane or pointing I don't know. The next few he didn't really look at.
Then we went and had tea. James stuffed himself and while having tea and watching him eat and stare off into space I lost it and tears started flowing with all the frustration and sense of loss I am currently feeling so had a good talk with Michelle.
After tea he perked up and we played some more, I love the way he now seeks me out if I walk down the end of the house..I guess he knows he will get a bounce up and down at least.
Being such a nice evening I decided to get the hell out of the house and so took him and his little trike up to the school which we haven't done for ages. That was awesome and he tore around on it at the tennis courts, then onto the ramped concrete path by the playground tearing down there at high speed (for a little plastic trike!) in complete control even when braking (sandal brakes). He is a bit of a natural actually and lifts his feet for more speed and knows the radius of the turns he can take at what particular speed. This is something I want to get him more into and ultimately onto two wheels.
He used a couple of words tonight up there. At one point he walked away from his bike and then when he returned from going walkabout, saw his bike, smiled and said 'bike'! He also said 'circle' while sitting on the ground looking at and rubbing his hands over the yellow paint of the netball court shooting circles. And he also said 'shadow' after I said it about ten times while pointing to his shadow. He is funny with shadows they are a source of great interest to him. He gets off his bike to look and runs about flapping his arms about and looking at the shadow. A couple of times I put his bike somewhere else and then pointed to it and said bike, but he just doesn't get pointing..yet.
While I was up there watching him I thought about the poem 'Welcome to Holland' and felt pretty happy.
http://www.child-autism-parent-cafe.com/welcome-to-holland.html
I took him home and he was pretty unhappy at being home he wanted to be on his bike (which reminds me I must fix the gate latch ASAP he was playing with that to get back out). This was fixed by an ice cream from Mum and then two bananas.
When I went to wipe his face with a wet face cloth a very interesting thing happened. He basically freaked out and the following happened:
Crying and wailing and jumping up and down, followed by him putting the cloth repeatedly in my hand. We all came over (me, Michelle, Hannah) to try and work out what was the problem as he was babbling a lot too and we are trying hard to open up communication with him. Eventually he grabs Hannah and Michelle and leads them outside by the hand. And he keeps putting the cloth in my hand. It seems he has put them outside because he doesn't want them here as he's trying to show or tell me something without them getting in the way.
I am trying to put it back on his face as he doesn't seem to mind that although it doesn't exactly make him happy, eventually I wet it some more - at which point he gets frantic as I take it away to the tap - ball it up a bit and put in it his mouth as I wonder if his teeth are bothering him, and he starts to suck on the cloth and becomes quieter at which point I work out he is thirsty, I get him his drink and immeidately peace and happiness reigns!
I wish he could say ' drink pease' like he used to, but at least he was trying in his way.
To bed and he was stuffed and a bit grizzly.
I feel a little bit bad about not spending as much time with Hannah as I could at the moment, so I read her a good chapter of her book and played the 'pillow' game with her ( pretend to be going to sleep and she is annoying pillow that must learn to behave and not wake me up).
A pretty poor day that turned out pretty good in the end.
After I got home from work I changed into my SI (Standard Issue shorts and tshirt) and played with him on the floor. We played with Duplo bricks but I think he was frustrated as he was breaking the bricks up and sort of smashing them together. We played a bit with him standing on my chest and me holding his hands to support him as we do, with him jumping up and down and gritting his teeth and making sort of grunting and hissing noises. He likes to almost headbutt me, and sometime does. I wonder if it's him letting a bit of pent up energy, frustration etc out. He also squealed at ear shattering volume a few times, my ears are ringing a bit now!
I took him out on the tramp and we bounced around and played a bit. I would love to hear him say 'posie' or 'meenie' again (Ring a ring a Rosie song or Eenie Meenie song) like he used to. A few planes went over and I pointed up at them and said plane. The first few times he looked at them, whether from the noise or me saying plane or pointing I don't know. The next few he didn't really look at.
Then we went and had tea. James stuffed himself and while having tea and watching him eat and stare off into space I lost it and tears started flowing with all the frustration and sense of loss I am currently feeling so had a good talk with Michelle.
After tea he perked up and we played some more, I love the way he now seeks me out if I walk down the end of the house..I guess he knows he will get a bounce up and down at least.
Being such a nice evening I decided to get the hell out of the house and so took him and his little trike up to the school which we haven't done for ages. That was awesome and he tore around on it at the tennis courts, then onto the ramped concrete path by the playground tearing down there at high speed (for a little plastic trike!) in complete control even when braking (sandal brakes). He is a bit of a natural actually and lifts his feet for more speed and knows the radius of the turns he can take at what particular speed. This is something I want to get him more into and ultimately onto two wheels.
He used a couple of words tonight up there. At one point he walked away from his bike and then when he returned from going walkabout, saw his bike, smiled and said 'bike'! He also said 'circle' while sitting on the ground looking at and rubbing his hands over the yellow paint of the netball court shooting circles. And he also said 'shadow' after I said it about ten times while pointing to his shadow. He is funny with shadows they are a source of great interest to him. He gets off his bike to look and runs about flapping his arms about and looking at the shadow. A couple of times I put his bike somewhere else and then pointed to it and said bike, but he just doesn't get pointing..yet.
While I was up there watching him I thought about the poem 'Welcome to Holland' and felt pretty happy.
http://www.child-autism-parent-cafe.com/welcome-to-holland.html
I took him home and he was pretty unhappy at being home he wanted to be on his bike (which reminds me I must fix the gate latch ASAP he was playing with that to get back out). This was fixed by an ice cream from Mum and then two bananas.
When I went to wipe his face with a wet face cloth a very interesting thing happened. He basically freaked out and the following happened:
Crying and wailing and jumping up and down, followed by him putting the cloth repeatedly in my hand. We all came over (me, Michelle, Hannah) to try and work out what was the problem as he was babbling a lot too and we are trying hard to open up communication with him. Eventually he grabs Hannah and Michelle and leads them outside by the hand. And he keeps putting the cloth in my hand. It seems he has put them outside because he doesn't want them here as he's trying to show or tell me something without them getting in the way.
I am trying to put it back on his face as he doesn't seem to mind that although it doesn't exactly make him happy, eventually I wet it some more - at which point he gets frantic as I take it away to the tap - ball it up a bit and put in it his mouth as I wonder if his teeth are bothering him, and he starts to suck on the cloth and becomes quieter at which point I work out he is thirsty, I get him his drink and immeidately peace and happiness reigns!
I wish he could say ' drink pease' like he used to, but at least he was trying in his way.
To bed and he was stuffed and a bit grizzly.
I feel a little bit bad about not spending as much time with Hannah as I could at the moment, so I read her a good chapter of her book and played the 'pillow' game with her ( pretend to be going to sleep and she is annoying pillow that must learn to behave and not wake me up).
A pretty poor day that turned out pretty good in the end.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
7/2/2010
Took James to Sebs birthday party at Chipmunks. He was really excited to be there. I took him up some of the padded stairs and let him go into the different structures and stuff they have there. I put him into the ball pit and just watched him. While other kids were jumping in and out and throwing balls at one another he sat in the middle not noticing the goings on around him and just looking at the balls in his hands. And fitting a half of a ball he found onto a whole ball. It made me sad to see him isolated. Later on he fell off a slide and banged his head on the ground. I picked him up and cuddled him while he cried, then just sat on the ground with him, running my fingers through his hair which I think he likes. I stopped and he took my hand and pulled it I think to say he wanted me to keep doing that, even though he was still sobbing.
Later in the day I spent a lot of time down at his level getting good eye contact and just being with him and around him. We played with Duplo and when things fell over I would say 'crash'!
At bath time I just sat and observed him, and smiled at him whenever he looked at me. He started playing with two cups pouring water out of one into the other. So I went and got two cups of my own and stated pouring water into his with him and he started pouring water into mine.
And onto bed. I have just been into his bedroom where he is still awake due to a 5 minute nap re-power he had this avo while watching Sam-eye Jack (and also the lights weren't fully dimmed). He was trying to put clothes on and had a long sleeve top around his waist like pants. I have tucked him in and he looks happy and should hopefully go to sleep.
Later in the day I spent a lot of time down at his level getting good eye contact and just being with him and around him. We played with Duplo and when things fell over I would say 'crash'!
At bath time I just sat and observed him, and smiled at him whenever he looked at me. He started playing with two cups pouring water out of one into the other. So I went and got two cups of my own and stated pouring water into his with him and he started pouring water into mine.
And onto bed. I have just been into his bedroom where he is still awake due to a 5 minute nap re-power he had this avo while watching Sam-eye Jack (and also the lights weren't fully dimmed). He was trying to put clothes on and had a long sleeve top around his waist like pants. I have tucked him in and he looks happy and should hopefully go to sleep.
Sat 6/2/2010
First Blog, here goes.
Worked on the fort; got the deck nailed down, made the hatch and mounted the iron bar on the side. The bar is to stick the planks over and also for swinging on and as a handle for climbing up the side.
It wasn't until 1-ish that I could play with the kids. Vanessa popped around with her kids and we all (except Michelle) went up and got lollies and stuff at the dairy. James was a bit upset about something, I am certain at not going where he expected but a constant supply of jet planes (thanks Luke) and twisties on the way back seemed to help..
Did a lot of jumping with him and getting him to climb up me and flip over in the afternoon (oh my back!). Went to Michelles Mum's for a BBQ, couple of things was really pleased about. Was out with him on the driveway and I was kicking a ball up the driveway and he got it and carefully picked it up in two hands and threw it to me with a grin on his face. We did this a few times before he lost interest. Also I took him up on the surround to her deck walking along the planks. He was freaking out a bit so we got down. Then later he started climbing up it by himself. And walking along a little bit. Very pleased!
Also did a bush bash around the top of the deck where its all trees and stuff. He went immediately back into it and nearly fell over and down a hole. He then went charging off across the lawn down to the bottom where he crashed into the overgrown stuff and fell over. It is fantastic to see him exploring his boundaries more, even though it scares me a little, he ran up the driveway and onto the footpath and was probably going to run across the street if I hadn't been there. But I always am.
Later that night stayed up late reading another book about autism and googling and reading on the TM forum. Funny thing was James got into our bed about 2 or 3am or so, later on he woke both me and Michelle with manic giggling..but he was asleep and was dreaming. Thats a first.
Worked on the fort; got the deck nailed down, made the hatch and mounted the iron bar on the side. The bar is to stick the planks over and also for swinging on and as a handle for climbing up the side.
It wasn't until 1-ish that I could play with the kids. Vanessa popped around with her kids and we all (except Michelle) went up and got lollies and stuff at the dairy. James was a bit upset about something, I am certain at not going where he expected but a constant supply of jet planes (thanks Luke) and twisties on the way back seemed to help..
Did a lot of jumping with him and getting him to climb up me and flip over in the afternoon (oh my back!). Went to Michelles Mum's for a BBQ, couple of things was really pleased about. Was out with him on the driveway and I was kicking a ball up the driveway and he got it and carefully picked it up in two hands and threw it to me with a grin on his face. We did this a few times before he lost interest. Also I took him up on the surround to her deck walking along the planks. He was freaking out a bit so we got down. Then later he started climbing up it by himself. And walking along a little bit. Very pleased!
Also did a bush bash around the top of the deck where its all trees and stuff. He went immediately back into it and nearly fell over and down a hole. He then went charging off across the lawn down to the bottom where he crashed into the overgrown stuff and fell over. It is fantastic to see him exploring his boundaries more, even though it scares me a little, he ran up the driveway and onto the footpath and was probably going to run across the street if I hadn't been there. But I always am.
Later that night stayed up late reading another book about autism and googling and reading on the TM forum. Funny thing was James got into our bed about 2 or 3am or so, later on he woke both me and Michelle with manic giggling..but he was asleep and was dreaming. Thats a first.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
