James woke up pretty happy this morning about 7:15, and was sitting in his bed smiling for a wee while. I went in to say hello as I always do and gave him a cuddle. He went into our room after a bit and I realised his nappy smaelt pretty bad so got Michelle to change him. He was reluctant but we explained that 'theres poos in there' and 'we need to change your nappy', and so he came into his bedroom. He initially wouldn't come and sit on the floor and Michelle kept coaxing him with language - instead of picking him up and putting him on the floor, and after about 30 seconds he came and lay down to be changed.
After that he got in our bed and was snuggling under the covers. I chucked the sheets and blankets over his head so he was covered - I got the idea from his wriggling that maybe he wanted to do this and was struggling to 'get under' the sheets, and he seemed to enjoy it.
I then told him it was time for breakfast and to come with me. He was a little reluctant at first mention, but by repeating myself about breakfast I got him to come along easily - and holding his hand.
I placed him on the stool and asked him if he wanted toast or weetbix. As usual no response. He was not really looking at me. I asked several times. I looked around for the pictures but we do not have one of weetbix, so just made him weetbix. While the weetbix was in the microwave he grizzled a little and was looking over towards it. Wehn I got the weetbix out and put it in front of him he just looked at it, so I started him off by putting some in his mouth and giving him the spoon and so he started feeding himself.
He ate about 2/3 and then started making noises about getting down. He will not get off the stool by himself. I also made toast with peanut butter. I got the peanut butter out and said 'peanut butter' and held it in front of hima lot but he was not really looking. I put the jar on my head and got a smile but nothing else. He didn't seem interested in the toast when I made it - just not hungry I guess.
I mentioned little school this morning a few times, this as usual gets a smile and some wriggling type 'happy' movements, which is cool. When he's very happy he does jumping.
When I came to get him dressed he was in our room, I was in his, I called him to come and get his 'little school tshirt on' and he came and did this. I put his short on standing up and said 'feet in the holes' as I always do and he put one foot, I asked again for him to put the second using 'other foot in the hole' but he didn't and seemed away with the fairys so I did this myself. When I do any dressing he likes to hang on to me and stops using his balance.
After that Hannah turned the TV on and he sat down to watch, I turned it off (not allowed) and he just sat there, after a while he played with the remote a little maybe to try and turn the TV on, who knows.
Through the morning we did quite a bit of the 'jumping game' on the bed and other places, he was quite keen and would come and seek me out. I would do this accompanied with counting or 'bounce, bounce, bounce'.
As usual when it came time to get in the car he came easily with prompting and no need to hold his hand - 'come on James lets go and hop in the car, we're going to little school', but he is very reluctant to walk down the stairs himself and groans, so I hold his hand. I do this by only letting him hold a finger and stay in front of hi, that way he can't rely on my balance and actually does it himself - otherwise he would hold on and use my balance and swing around, but I think it gives him reassurance. Perhaps walking up and down is something I can work on with him..
When I parked the car at LS I got out and was waving at him through the window and making faces but getting little reaction, he was away with the fairies so I opened the door and was putting my face next to him and being silly and nuzzling and kissing him, and got lots of smiles and wriggling. Got Hannah to take him in and when we got in he started grizzling so I took his hand as I went around the place and he was happy at that - it's almost like as he gets in and turns around once or twice he loses sight of me and worries that I am gone. We then went and played in the mat room with some little elephants of different sizes and shapes that you connect up, Hannah leading the way with making a big ring. I showed James how they click together and he started doing this. We stayed probably 10 minutes talking to Lisa and then I told him I was going and gave him quite a few kisses and some cuddles. He seemed OK, maybe a little tired (saw a yawn) or zoned out. We then got up and left waving to him and saying goodbye with him giving us some eye contact, he frowned a little but was otherwise fine. It was quite in there, there were no other kids, and I think the settling time and peace (also classical music was playing quietly) helps.
We waved through the window and he did look at us and did a little bit of wriggling and frowning but was otherwise good, so we left.
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THOUGHTS
I have been thinking about the sensory side after watching vidoes on the Taylor Morris site last night. For example her talking about how fleece actually hurts her hands and thumbs but she can wear it fine, and how some sounds cause physical pain. Also the 15yr old boy talking about going outside into the noisy bright world and it's like everything goes upside down, and starts spinning.
I now wonder if the wriggling is a reaction to certain materials on him? I wonder how things feel to him in general? And I wonder if he is hurting all the time with some things..or not. He does seem to be the type that when things are bothering him - in as much as we can tell - that he becomes withdrawn more. Sounds don't seem to bother him as far as we can tell, but it could be they do and we don't know.
In other thoughts, how am I feeling? To quote Marcellus Wallace from pulp fiction "I'm pretty fucking far from alright".
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