We have been reading two books from Autism NZ and both finished tonight. I asked Michelle how hers went, it followed several kids at a younger age then their status 15 or so years later.
Michelle said the outcome for most was not good, and then had a good cry. She does not want James to grow up to live in a house with several other 'mental' men and have a job pushing shopping trollies at Woolworths. We talked. I talked about James' positives. The way he is now answering to his name. How he is quite social; even though he doesn't talk he seems to want to be around people. How he sleeps well. How he likes physical affection. How he seems to get bored and likes stimulation, and how when he gets it as in let loose in the garage the babble - sounds of happiness - spill out of him. How maybe he is like I was as a youngster just maybe more so; so many things like the boredom aspect are like me.

Today I tried being forceful in my tone and insisting that he do things like lie down for me on the floor. I feel he understands my intent (I say that from several things such as the way he bursts into tears if I tell him off and smiles sometimes when I am asking him to do something which he doesn't do). Its like he understands at some level the tone. This is a very encouraging thing. So I want to continue down this path of trying to treat him more like a normal kid, i.e. persuading, admonishing when required, praise (I include rubbing his back and chest with the praise) and all that.

I told Michelle that the only people in the world that truly care about James are us - to be fair the rest do want the best for him, but within their realm - as special Ed people, or daycare workers or relatives- but he's not there's and at the end of the day they go home. The most powerful thing Michelle and I have is our love for each other and for James and so we need to be the ones to take responsibility for his development, and get in his face and work with him.
And as she said very importantly keep talking to one another all the time.